St Paddy’s Day is an important day for Ireland, signifying a deeply meaningful cultural event….that was consummated by a green drink and a leprechaun. It’s also a very big day in the U.S., because of all the
Irish immigrants love o’ drinkin!
Dallas is no exception; the town hosts a huge parade, with associated festivities lasting from the top of the mornin’ to bottom of the evenin’.
Even I, sober since Halloween 2011, couldn’t miss the opportunity to down a few pints of green beer with me favorite lads. Although less hardcore than my friends having mimosas and car bombs for breakfast, I began the day with a martini at noon, pledging to last all day, before the inevitable blackout.
After a few martinis, my high school friend, Amanda (typically a scary notion to re-party with anybody associated with high school Tracey), Amanda’s boyfriend, Jake, and I head to meet my sister at one of the many block parties on Greenville Avenue. Against all odds, we find the house party and I am greeted by my very own pot o’ gold: a moon bounce in the front yard!! I excitedly jump straight into the moon bounce, only to fall in the cracks, unable to pull myself up.
Jake kindly drags me out by my feet, and we head to the real party, where my gold-fish-memory makes a grand debut in the following conversation:
Guy selling energy drink: “You want to buy my energy drink?”
Me: “Does it have alcohol in it?”
Energy Drink Man: “No”
Me: (thinking I misheard the kind lad, as this is a party, and surely he wouldn’t sell something without alcohol): “But, there’s liquor, right?”
Energy: “No alcohol. But, you can put alcohol in it!”
Me: “Okay, cool. But, there is vodka in here, right?”
Me: “Cool, as long as it’s alcoholic, I’m in! Here’s $5!” (gets energy drinks, spills it everywhere) “Eh, I don’t like rum much anyway”. (heads to moon bounce).
En route to the moon bounce, I stop by the bathroom where I have a very meaningful, deep conversation with “Bathroom Girl”, give her a big hug, likely exclaim my love for her, and then head outside to meet up with Sreetham, Joy, Katie & gang. After showing them where the energy drinks are (“Don’t worry guys, there is vodka in it. I checked”), I proceed to get in an argument and then make up with a gay little leprechaun, David. When I tell my sister I made up with David, she exclaims, “WHAT? You made out with David? But…that makes no sense”, to which I (having already forgotten the argument and subsequent conversation), ponder “Yea, that is weird. I wonder why I did that?”
The rest of the day’s activities are a blur, but the luck of the Irish is with me the following day, when I wake up hangover free, to a beautiful morning, with almost all of my possessions from the previous day. On top of that grand luck, I attend a chili cook off, where I meet Bathroom Girl (Rachel) and Energy Drink Man (Benji), amongst a host of new lads.
St. Party’s Day = grand slam!